Christmas Jokes

Why is Christmas just like any other day at the office?
You do all the hard work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Darth Vader: ‘Luke, I know what you’re getting for Christmas’
Luke: ‘Oh yeah, Dad? How’s that then?’
Darth Vader: ‘Because I have felt your presents’

Good King Wenceslas phoned for a pizza. The salesgirl on the end of the line asked him; ‘Do you want your usual? Deep pan, crisp and even?’

What is the purpose of reindeer?
It makes the grass grow, honeybunch.

What’s the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?
Snowballs.

Never catch snowflakes on your tongue until ALL the birds have flown south for the winter.

What would have happened if there had been three wise women instead of men?
They would have asked for directions.

Why is ill conceived love like a cheap Christmas cracker?
A quick, disappointing bang and the novelty soon wears off.

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2 Responses to “Christmas Jokes”

  1. tiegan Says:

    your jokes are not funny

  2. John Says:

    Cracker jokes - love it, they are not supposed to be funny Tiegan, thats the point duuuuuuurrr!!!

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